Tears
Dying. Death. Last days. I never imagined that after all the shit Layla has been put through, all the sickness and pain she’s had to endure, that the cancer might win. I had hope and faith in God that he would heal her little body completely. That he already HAD. I had faith that we would get scan results and celebrate. I prayed fervently that she would be part of that 30% that survived this vicious monster.
Friday we got news that the cancer was winning. While we were bombarding her body with chemo and radiation, while we were poisoning her to the verge of death, while she was unable to move in her bed from pain, the cancer was growing and multiplying. She has a new tumor that is invading her one good kidney. That kidney is functioning at 59% right now, which means surgery (and any possible damage to that kidney) is not an option. While there are a few options in this general scenario, Layla is not eligible for any of them. Her kidneys must be functioning at 70% for any clinical studies or more radiation. If God works a miracle in her and restores her kidney function, we could hop on a plane tomorrow to Sloan Kettering Cancer Center in New York and continue treatment that is not offered at TCH. Unfortunately, that isn’t an option at the moment.
We are left with 2 options. Both offer the same results. The goal now isn’t to get rid of the cancer, it’s to slow down the growth. Her tumors are growing rapidly and if we do nothing, there’s a good chance she won’t be here for her sister’s 9th birthday on Feb 24th. We have chosen to do a daily oral chemo. Yep. Every day. For the rest of her little life. There are minimal side effects and there’s a good chance we’ll get to spend another 2 months with sweet Layla. After 2 months we will re-scan and see if there has been any growth. If there has not (and this is what we’re praying our hearts out for) then she stays on the chemo and we check again in another 2 months. Studies have shown that in 50% of patients, the tumor growth stops. Sounds great right? Take some chemo every day and just live with the tumors. They’re not causing her any pain yet, so theoretically, that wouldn’t be so bad. As long as that tumor doesn’t creep any farther into that good kidney, this would be the optimal outcome for Layla (aside from complete healing!!!). So what happens to the other 50%? Their tumors continue to grow. At the 2 months mark, 50% of patients have larger tumors. God forbid Layla falls in this category, we can try another type of IV chemo. The big problem with this one is that it will make her very ill. If the oral chemo didn’t work, the chances of the IV chemo working are slim to none.
So now we’re faced with a huge decision. Try the IV chemo and reduce her quality of life or not do anything and just control her pain as the cancer takes over her tiny body. So do we delay the inevitable, put her through more hell, and are unable to enjoy her in hopes that she falls into the tiny category of people whose tumors slow down? Or do we choose to do nothing, knowing we have precious few weeks with her but get to enjoy her? I feel like I’m playing God here. God, what path do we choose???
Basically, Dr. R told us to prepare like we have 2 months left with her. She’s one of the top Neuroblastoma Specialists in the country. She sees this every day. If she says 2 months, I believe her. However, I also believe in God. I believe that he can heal Layla and completely restore her body. I believe in miracles. In 2 months when Layla has scans again, I pray that we see the tumor growth not only stop, but the tumors shrinking. How glorious would that be??
I walked out of the hospital Friday trying to hold myself together and as I walked past the PICU, I saw a couple coming out with a clear plastic bag containing a child’s belongings….and no child. The woman was sobbing hysterically and the husband was doing his best to support her and be strong. I said a prayer for them and continued walking. I got about 5 steps then realized that would be me in the very near future.
How will I cram a lifetime of memories into 2 months? How do you prepare your heart for the loss of a child? How will I tell our other children? How will I walk by her empty room every single day? How will I keep the memory of her sweet voice and piercing blue eyes? How will I even get out of bed?
I know that when it’s God’s time, and he calls Layla home, she will forevermore be healed and pain free. I know she will see glorious things that us here on earth can’t even imagine. I have prayed daily… hourly, to God that he take her pain away and heal her completely. He will, I just fear it’s not going to be in the way I had hoped. I pictured her growing up and going to medical school, becoming a Neuroblastoma Specialist (there are only a handful of them in the US) and doing something wonderful with her life. Instead, I am trying to prepare my heart for the fact that at the tiny age of 2, she has almost accomplished what God sent her to do. And she has done a FABULOUS job!! She has drawn people closer to God, showed strength beyond comprehension, brought smiles to thousands with her constant happiness and made me count each day I get with her as a blessing. Those who know her personally are drawn in by her sense of humor and infectious laugh. Layla Grace is the perfect name for a perfect little girl.
******
WHEW!! It literally took me 2 evenings to get this blog post out! I would write a sentence then stop to cry. I’d wake Layla up just to hold her. I *might* have just drank a bottle of wine as I typed, so if there are typos…please excuse them!!
Am so very sorry about everything that’s going on there…decisions that parents should never have to make. The Lord will be with your family every step of the way. Praying as always!
Psalm 61:1-4: Hear my cry, O God; attend unto my prayer. From the end of the earth will I cry unto thee, when my heart is overwhelmed: lead me to the rock that is higher than I. For thou hast been a shelter for me, and a strong tower from the enemy. I will abide in thy tabernacle for ever: I will trust in the covert of thy wings. Selah.
Prayer Bears
My email address
I don’t know you, but I heard about you from a friend. I want you to know that I am crying tears with you and praying with you as well. Your daughter is so beautiful and strong for going through so much in her life already. I also want you to know that God is good. He hears your prayers and knows your pain. He will see you through no matter what. I don;t really know what else to say, but I hope and pray for the best for you and your sweet baby girl.
Nooooo!! This cannot be… I’m heartbroken for your family!!!
Praying for her miracle.. It will happen, we have to believe!!
It breaks my heart to learn of another sweet precious child losing the battle with this killer. I am Sophie Atay’s auntie and as you will maybe know, our family are too facing this same devastating period. Words will never be enough to describe the heartache and pain of having to come to terms with losing them, even if they are going to a better place where their pain and suffering will be over and their bodies will be healed. I know I am selfish and at the moment still cannot accept that we will lose Sophie, I pray each day for a miracle. You have said above everything we are feeling, I cannot even begin to understand or contemplate the feelings that yourself and my sister Karine are going through as parents, I only can imagine and hope I never have to feel that pain as a parent. I only know a part of me is dying and my heart aches every waking moment. I will keep your beautiful baby in my prayers also. God Bless xxxx
Ryan and Shanna,
We are in anguish with you over this latest news, and the difficult decisions you are having to make. May God give you wisdom and strength as you walk this path. Below is my prayer for your family from Psalm 5:
1 Give ear to my words, O LORD,
consider my sighing.
2 Listen to my cry for help,
my King and my God,
for to you I pray.
3 In the morning, O LORD, you hear my voice;
in the morning I lay my requests before you
and wait in expectation. . .
11 But let all who take refuge in you be glad;
let them ever sing for joy.
Spread your protection over them,
that those who love your name may rejoice in you.
My heart ache and yesterday I went to church and prayed for Layla and your family. My eyes are watery. I cannot imagine the pain and frustration that your family is feeling right now. I wish there is more than prayers that I could do. I cannot explain it but Layla is just one of my favorite among the kids that I pray for. Something with her that just touch me and attract my attention at the very beginning. I never met Layla but I love her so much.
Lots of prayers for Layla and your family.
“Anyone can give up, it’s the easiest thing in the world to do. But to hold it together when everyone else would understand if you fell apart, that’s true strength.”
COLE Prayer Team
Edith Quiteles
I am so so sorry…. what can I say? This must be so tough! I had been following your carepage but hadn’t heard for a while and then saw on someone elses page that things were not good and so I found your blog. I agree with you that after all she’s been through and then to loose seems so awful…. but I will continue to pray for a miracle! If she is not meant to be healed on this earth then my prayer is for a peaceful and pain free last few months. Love and prayers for you and your family… Gerry Toews
I am so sorry to hear what you are going through! I pray that God would heal her completly on this side of Heaven!!!
I know you said there are not many more treatment options for her. Have you looked into something natural? Like herbs or a raw food diet? I have heard stories where people were healed with herbs and food. God gave us these to use and to benefit our bodies. I just don’t want to see Layla taken from your family! I know there are herbs that help the kindey function. You could visit a health food store or visit bulkherbstore.com they have tons of stuff and books. Also hacres.com as info on raw food. The guy that started it had colon cancer and beat it with thee change of diet. I just pray something gets found to keep Layla here with her family!!!! Just thought I would share!
Shanna –
PRAYERS, PRAYERS, PRAYERS & STRENGTH coming your way!!! I just can’t even beleive this is happening!!!!!!!! My heart is full for you all and we are still praying for a miracle!!!!
Sending hope, strength, and prayers for you and your family. This isn’t an easy thing to go through…but acceptance will come with the Grace of Our Lord. You can do this!!
Shanna
Praying for Layla
My heart is breaking for you and your family. I hope that this brings hope to you and your family. 4 years ago Nov 05 my son Colby was diagnosed with stage IV NB we followed protocol including the tandem transplant. At our 3mth scans right before acutane Colby tumor was back. We were told that we had about 2mths so we decided that we would do what ever it took to save him he did 3 rounds of Topo/Cyclo until his kidneys started to shut down from all the chemo that he had received over the last 9 months in Feb 07 we started him on or cytoxin he was on that for 2 1/2 years with stable scans we took him off Sept 09 and he Praise God has been NED by the way he is 6 and in kindergarden. We never dreamed that he would still be here with us so keep your faith strong God has a plan for all of our kids. If oyu need anything at all or have any questions please call me here is my cell 979-412-5051. I am so sorry that your baby is in the fight of her life. We are also patients of Dr Russell at TCH jsut not up there much anymore
I have been praying for Layla daily, and was absolutely shocked and so saddened to see this update.
My prayers will continue and intensify for complete healing for your beautiful daughter and your entire family.
May God continue to bless you all.
My love to Sweet, Beautiful Layla.
You are in my prayers. I am praying for healing and for discernment for your family.
Shanna – What a strong woman of faith you are. As I read what is some of the most heartbreaking news ever all I can think is WOW, what a strong woman you are. I am so proud to call you a friend and I am sooooo glad that Layla has you for a Mommy. You have mentioned some of her great qualities but I know that you and Ryan have had a lot to do with that and she has a lot to be proud of as well. Keep your faith up… Layla has so many prayers going out and I pray that she will be in that wonderful side of the 50%. Love you! – Sherry
I wish and pray with all of my heart that Layla will be healed. Be strong even though it seems impossible at times. I will prayer for her tonight and every night.
i don’t know else to say, but that i am so very sorry. my heart breaks for you, your family and your beautiful little girl. i am a mom in nc with two healthy children (so far, thank god) and i can’t imagine what you are going through. you are all in my thoughts and prayers.
I came up on your blog by following a re-tweet of your latest (heartbreaking, just can’t be true, news.) I’m SO very sorry but we must believe God has great plans for your Layla. I said a special prayer for your family and of course, miss Layla this AM, and she’s been on my mind a lot these days. Praying and hoping God gives you the guidance you need during this trial of life.
Your story has caputred my heart as I know the hearts of hundreds if not thousands. Our hearts hurt with you as well as for you. God’s heart even hurts as He knows the anguish of loosing a Child. May you know that many ‘strangers in grieving’ at Cypress Bible Church are praying for you. A father once said as he reflected on the very untimely death of his daughter, “Grief is the price we pay for loving someone. If there were no love, there would be no grief.”
II Thessalonians 3:16
Shanna,
I’m absolutely heart broken, but I have faith and I believe and will continue to pray that Layla be healed. She is in God’s hands and I know that he will comfort her.
I wish there was more that I could say or do. Just know that you, Layla and the entire Marsh family are in my every thought. I am here if you need ANYTHING. Never hesitate to call.
XOXO
I can’t find any better words to say other that this just sucks and is unfair! Layla should not be having to go through this. Ok, there I said it … I know it’s not very proper but it’s exactly what I was thinking the whole time I read your post.
God has been known to pull some awesome miracles, and I have a feeling that he will do just the same for little Layla Grace. She deserves this miracle. I am doing my best at letting her story be known to others and encourage them to pray for her daily, just as I do.
I’m sure others have offered and I’m not sure if you are up for it, but please let me know if you would want your little girl’s pictures taken, I’m more than happy to provide them to you for no charge. Or it could even be a family photo session, just please feel free to contact me if it’s something you are interested in.
God Bless you and your sweet little Layla Grace!
“For with God nothing will be impossible.” (Luke 1:37)
Regards,
Lane
Photography Website: http://www.laneharris.com
I can not even fathom what you are facing and the decisions you are and will have to make. Following your story I’ve been asking God the questions of how can this happen to such a sweet baby who has so much life yet to live! I wanted to tell you that I am praying for you every single day and your sweet Layla Grace is on my mind all day long! I’m praying that God will give you strength to go through this time in your life, I’m praying that He will guide you in the decisions you will be making and praying for peace for your entire family, however it goes and knowing that God will see you through. And mostly I am praying a pleading to God that He gives you a miracle and heals your precious baby girl!
I was in your situation in 19876-87 when my daughter was diagnosed with lukemia. She was 19 years old when diagnosed. Boy did my world hit bottom. We also were told it was in remission but then it would pop up again. She went through all the chemo they knew about at that time and started radiation. We lived at the hospital most of that time. So I know how much hurting you are going through. If you would like to just talk, cry, pray I am only a phone call away.(985) 974-0556 or email me I will try to help you any way I can. Sometimes it helps to talk to someone that has been there. May God grante you the peace He had for me. God Bless
Pauline
I do not know you but I know you. I am the mother of a little girl and I cannot even imagine what you are going through. Please know that there are strangers, like myself, out here ,that are praying for you, wrapping their arms around you and your family and wanting you to know, we care and we are here whenever you need us.
Shanna, I love you. And all I can say is that I love you and Layla, and I know that sometimes words just aren’t able to make the situation better or feel any better. But I will be coming home more now, and I will always be there whenever you need a hug,(whenever im home lol) or even if you need to cry. I know that you and ryan are gonna do everything to make Layla’s days special, and she is so incredibly lucky to have yall as parents. I love you guys and just know that with God on your side, ANYTHING is possible. Praying for a miracle.
I’m at a loss of words….I am keeping your entire family in our prayers and will not give up hope, miracles do happen, don’t give up. There’s no right or wrong with whatever path you and Ryan choose in going forward with sweet Layla’s treatment, God will hold her hand and be with you all.
There is no words to express how I feel, I haven’t sleep since Friday…
since I found Layla’s story there is no day I don’t check how she is doing I can’t believe how strong you and your little princess are. You have changed my life and the way I will live it. I do believe in MIRACLES! I have seen them.. We have to believe and it will happen.
I know we not even know each other but please consider me your friend and if there is anything you need. I will always be here.
Mary mar Labrador.
The choices you have been faced with have been the hardest a parent would ever have to face. But know you have made all the right ones because you have put your faith in God. He has helped you make those choices as hard as they might have been. I pray for your family and I know that whatever happens he is with you. Miracles do happen and the miracles that prayer has been a part of are amazing. If you need anything please let me know. My family will do whatever is needed to help you and your family. You are in his hands, all our love.
Shanna, my heart breaks for your family. I wish I had some wise words. All I can say is that I will continue to pray for Layla and for a miracle. I will hold your family in my heart as you navigate this very unknown, difficult path.
You said what my heart feels: “I know she will see glorious things that us here on earth can’t even imagine.” When God takes her home, whenever that is, she will get to expereince the greatest peace and love beyond anything we can fathom. My prayer is that you take peace in knowing you are experiencing God’s perfect plan in action. Someday when she meets Jesus that you will have a precious angel forever watching down on you.
I am soo upset about the new updates. I just can’t imagine. I did go to chuch Sunday and asked them to pray for baby Layla. I don’t know you all but have followed Layla’s story since it started. She has drawn me in. My 10 daughter ask me why I was crying so I had to show her Layla and she couldn’t believe how pretty she was. She told me Layla was going to be ok which brought more tears. Layla I am praying for a miracle. You have touched my life and I remember you no matter what. I am going to get you a little something in the mail if it is ok with your mommy and daddy…Keep fighting baby girl.
Oh dear Lord! I only came across your site after a friend retweeted a post on Twitter. I don’t know what to say, I read your posts and cried my eyes out. I pray for little Layla Grace and for a miracle. No one should have to go through this, particulary a child. It makes you realise how much people take for granted in this world, and makes me think twice before complaining about petty situations.
I am so sorry that you and your darling daughter is going through this and I pray to God that she is back to her normal healthy self soon.
God bless xx
Think healing!!!! God says “for as he thinketh in his heart(spirit), so is he” (Prov.23:7) Meditating on gods word doesnt heal but meditating on gods word causes you to believe in your heart, and believing in your heart causes your healing to manifest. when you speak gods word out loud on healing you hear yourself affirming gods word, you will believe in your heart when you speak and believe, it will happen!
Shanna,
We will never stop praying for your miracle. God knows your heart…..you will choose what is best for Layla. I feel like when we pray for others we can take some of the burden from them. I hope that you can feel the heart felt prayers. Storming the Heavens for your sweet girl and your family!
Loving you in Christ,
Heather
My heart is breaking for your family. I am sitting here sobbing while reading your post. I am praying for a miracle for your sweet Layla! I am also spreading her story for more prayers because prayer is a POWERFUL thing!
I read about your sweet girl on a friend’s Facebook page. I am so sorry to hear that she is going through all of this. I am a parent of a child that has a chronic disease and spends a lot of time at TCH too and I have seen that same situation at the PICU. But I cannot imagine the anguish you feel as well. Please do not give up hope! I will be lifting her and your family up in prayer. I wish I could do something to help. I am a professional portrait photographer and I would like to offer a free photo shoot to your family. You may have already received offers for this, but it was one way I thought of that I could help. Please email me if you would be interested in something like this. Regardless, I am hoping and praying for a miracle for your sweet girl.
Your family is never far from my thoughts, and always in my prayers.
There are no words to say, no comfort to offer. Just know that your sweet child and her fight have touched and inspired so many people. We are all praying for Layla.
Oh dear God, heal this sweet baby. Heal her so she can stay with her family. Heal her Lord. Amen.
Praying for you & Layla tonight & the many to come. Allison
Marsh Family,
This is Bryson’s mom (boy in blue car)..As soon as I read about this my heart aches for you all..I pray daily that if a miracle was going to take place please place it upon Layla. May GOD be with you in this time of need and I think about Ms. Layla daily!!!
I am so sorry to read of the situation with dear Layla. I lost my 14 yr old son to childhood cancer on Jan 5, 2008. He was treated at TCH. My thoughts are with you and I extend an open hand to you in this manner…
Since I lost AJ, I co-founded an on-line community of parents and people in similar situations to advocate for increased funding for research and awareness campaigns. It’s grown to over 4300 people and can be an onlise source of support and connection with others, many of whom have gone thru the terrible time you may be facing. If we can be of any help….
People Against Childhood Cancer
http://curechildhoodcancer.ning.com/
Shanna,
I have a little five year old girl and your story is almost physically painful for me. The mother in me, can not process the reality, that our collection of moments with our children, do not go on forever indefinitely. Inevitably we leave them, or they will leave us. But one thing you must remember and hopefully it will give you strength, God has a purpose for Layla and before she was born, knew the course that her life would take..the joys, the sorrows, the pain, the smiles. That said, GOD can not be charged with giving Layla cancer. When I was 23, my cousin Ashley of the same age was gone in seven months from cancer and I..struggled. It took me a while to see the truth. So many people ask “Why, GOD?”, when God wasn’t responsible for the disease or the pain. He doesn’t set into motion murder, or death, or rape, or earthquakes, or famine, or misfortune. Not in isolated events anyway, but rather evil and suffering were introduced in the garden when Eve chose the apple. but in the beginning, God created a perfect world. To save us from the world we created in our greed, GOD gave his only son as the symbolic sacrifice, he will bleed (give away his blood) himself to be our SAVIOR. GOD will carry us, rock us to sleep, soothe our brow, hold our hand, wipe away our tears, pick us up if we can’t reach, help us see over other people’s heads, kiss our scratches, give us hope, try his damnedest to keep us safe despite the idiotic things we do, will rejuvenats our spirit, hold nightmares at bay, remind us with some little thing that the world is beautiful and better with us in it, even in our darkest hour. He is doing all these things for her right now. So know that he is working. He is working to heal Layla, he is working to heal you. Every smile she is able to give despite the pain, is God working. Every bittersweet moment is one where God is working. Every second that you hold her, so is he, and he will never let go. Right now when you need him most, he is carrying you both. If a miracle is possible, he will make it happen, there is nothing more powerful than God, but if the cancer spreads and spreads, so will Layla’s agony, IF God takes her to heaven it is not to be a vengeful God, but because of his grace…because of his promise and vow to his children, he will not let them suffer. Find comfort in the fact, he will not let her suffer more than her small body’s ability to endure. Pack a lifetime of love into the next two months and pray she feels well enough to receive it. Encourage Layla to talk to God. He will be her grace, just as SHE and he are yours.
I’ll keep her close to my heart and in my prayers,
Olivia
Shanna, Layla Grace and Family,
My heart is in such anguish as I’ve been praying for your family since early summer. I believe in miracles, and I do not want anyone to give up praying. Layla is strong and she will fight this fight. Don’t tell God how big your storm is, tell your storm how big God is.
I can’t imagine the way you are feeling right now, as my heart is so heavy I can’t take it. I sit in tears at night praying to God to please hear our prayers and grant us this miracle. Layla has opened my heart, and although I believed in Him before, my faith is even stronger now. I know that I must be strong in faith for Him to hear our prayers. My four year old was sitting on my lap the other night begging to look at more pictures of Layla Grace, so she can know who this little girl she prays for every night is.
Do not cast away your confidence, which has great reward. For you have need of patience, so that after you have done the will of God, you may receive the promise. (Hebrews 10:35-36)
God Bless and many prayers
The Burk Family
Keep your eyes on the Lord, He’s always there for you! Praying!
Psalm 62:1-2: Truly my soul waiteth upon God: from him cometh my salvation. He only is my rock and my salvation; he is my defence; I shall not be greatly moved.
Prayer Bears
My email address
Hi. I was sent a link from a friend via Facebook and wanted to let you know that my family is praying for you and little Layla Grace. I am amazed by your strength and that of your little girl. God truly has a special plan for your little angel be it here or in heaven. Take care and God Bless.
Dear Shanna and Family,
I am speechless, and heartbroken to hear that this disease has taken over beautiful little Layla. Let me tell you that I feel your pain. I’m dealing the same thing with my daughter Camilla. She also relapsed last week, and because of how fast she relapsed after her transplant and her kind of leukemia, (AML) there is really not much the Doctors can do. She is also taking chemo by mouth twice a day to buy us some time. Camilla’s leukemia came back a lot stronger, her bone marrow is getting full, it’s in her lungs and has a big tumor on her face. Camilla has been fighting for her life in ICU since last Tuesday.
Shanna, continue to have faith. We will see our little ones again, and in a perfect condition in a near future. There will be no pain, no hunger, no evil, no death. All these things shall pass. (Revelation 21, 3-4).
With much love, Elena (Camilla’s mom) cp:cduarte
I could have written this myself,……down to the eyes….only difference is the cancer type (he had all that morphed into t-cell lympohma) and he was a henry ~ not a Layla grace. The same exact thing happened to us…the tumors were invading his system, we had to decide the same things….one was coming out of his little head, through his eye….it was awful.. what you are living is terrible – horror. I am so sorry your sweet precious child is in limbo….i know exactly ho wyou feel spiritually….thinking about those things does not mean we don’t have faith…somehow, you see the truth and realize, through it all, we were awarded the miracle…….the child. It does not make sense. it is terrible cancer is killing our children, your lalyla grace.
May God deliver you peace like you’ve never expereinced to get you through these months…this life….thank you for being honest with your journey. it helps so many. the ones going through it and the ones who need to support us, going through it:) I am copying your beautiful words today and sharing them with everyone i know.
http://www.teamunite.net
Dear Layla’s family~ I have no words – only love and continued heartfelt prayers.
Dear Shanna,
My heart is bursting right now. I keep typing and deleting because I just don’t know the right thing to say and I wish so much that I did. I do want to thank you for sharing your story and letting so many people take this journey with you. I don’t think that you realize what a blessing you and Layla have been to so many-even people like me, who you don’t even know. It makes me realize and appreciate everything I have- My God, my son, my husband, and my family. Your story and your faith have touched so many people and will bring so many to God. Only His grace and compassion will bring you through this. I believe in the deepest part of my heart that God can heal Layla. You are such a great mom Shanna, and whatever decision you make will be the right one. I can only imagine how much it hurts to make these decisions at all. Just some friendly suggestions. Soak in those smiles and laughter. Cuddle cuddle cuddle. Hugs and kisses all day and all night. Everyday until the cancer is gone-give Layla a little miracle. Each day celebrate her life in some way. Maybe a princess party and let Layla be the princess. Bake cookies. Maybe I sound crazy and am suggesting the impossible when it all hurts so much but build memories. Also you could spend time each day praying with her. Reading her books about the Bible. Sing songs about Jesus. Every chance we get we ask our little boy where Jesus lives and he says in his heart because really that is all we have that is certain. I can not imagine what your poor heart and soul are going through, but I will continue to pray for you everyday. You have a friend in Pennsylvania sweetie, if you ever need anything don’t hesitate to contact me.
Shanna & Ryan,
I was devastated when I read this post…my heart breaks to think you all have to go through this with your sweet girl. God does work in miraculous ways & I will be praying for Layla and your entire family.
Kelly (from Radio Lollipop)
(((HUGS)))
I will continue to pray for complete healing of baby Layla Grace! God uses those with mighty faith, to share His Word and His Will, and you have made HIM so proud!
In Him,
Tracy
Ryan and Shanna,
Every time I read this post, I feel the same visceral, heart-wrenching sadness as the tears stream down my face. Yet I am overwhelmed by your faith and strength in facing these horrible decisions. Your Layla Grace is such a beautiful child- full of strength and spunk to fight this awful beast. I know she WILL WIN!! I am remaining strong in my belief that God will send Layla’s miracle– and until that day, please know Layla and your entire family is in my daily prayers!
I have followed Layla’s journey from day one. You do not know me but I have been lifting you all up in prayer ever since. I am so heart broken by the recent news but I, too will keep on praying for a miracle for Layla. She is precious. I can not imagine what your hearts are feeling. I know I cried through your entire post so I can understand why it took you a few days to get it all out. Please know so many people are loving Layla and praying so hard for her and all of you!
Mary
WV
You are a very strong Women, your Faith is amazing! I am praying for You, Layla, and Your Family, daily. I have been following Layla’s Story for months now and my heart is breaking after reading your latest post! The tears fall on my keyboard as I try to find the words to type. Her little face sits strong in my Memory and I pray that God gives Layla 100% healing! Praying Fervently!
Dear Shanna & Ryan,
I came across your blog the other day and I just wanted to write and say how much I admire your strength…….I have 6 children and can not even begin to imagine what you have been going thru. Your faith in God I am sure is what gets you thru each and every day. Me and my children will continue to pray for your precious little girl and her recovery. We too BELIEVE in miracles and will be praying and EXPECTING one! Thank you so much for sharing your story and making all of us stop and count our blessings every day…..Your little angel is truly an inspiration to everyone who reads her story…….
Our Prayers will be with you,
Emily
Shanna,
My heart aches that you’re faced with these decisions,and this unbearable pain.
I pray every day that the chemo shrinks the tumors, and that Layla’s kidneys reach the functioning percentage so that she can receive treatment at Sloan. Above all I pray that God heals those tumors.
Know that Layla Grace and your family are loved by so many, and that we are all praying for a miracle.
Carmen
I am Jayme’s sister and Jaime keeps me posted on your beautiful angel. I pray everyday that your sweet Layla is healed. You are strong, she is strong and God will answer you. Keep the faith and everyone is with on this journey and the power of prayer is very great. As hard as it is keep smiling sweetie and Layla will smile back. Love and prayers are sent your way from my family to yours.
If you really have faith in god i think you should take Layla to Lourdes i know it sounds crazy and all but if you go there and really pray miricals can happen example, a man in a wheelchair (never walked a day in his life) was praying when he tumbled out of the chair and got up himself and walked, another Lady had cancer and when she got home and went for a scan the doctors could’t find any trace of the cancer that was killing her, its just a suggestion but if any of my neighbours are going soon i’ll have them pray for Layla Xx
I could barely read through your whole post. Layla is just the most beautiful little girl and you have amazing strength. My heart breaks for you. Believe that I will be in constant prayer for your whole family and that Layla will be healed!
It took all of my strength to read your post without completely falling apart. My 6 mo old son was diagnosed with NB on Sept 8th, 2009. He completed 4 rounds of chemo and had his tumor resected on Dec 9th. He’s now a happy, healthy 10 mo old. I’ve always been so aware that we we’re blessed to have been given this amazing gift, but Layla’s struggle makes it even more clear.
I first saw Layla during our initial 2 wk hospital stay following diagnosis. Her wagon and big flower hats were always a bright spot in the long days on the 9th floor. I recognized you guys later in the Clinic and realized that Layla’s diagnosis was also NB. I regret not having the opportunity to talk to you guys, but please know how much Layla touched me. She’s an absolutely gorgeous and vibrant little girl. I’ve often prayed for your family and will continue to do so even more fervently than before. Please know that you guys have been an inspiration to other families, even if we weren’t able to tell you so (until now). God can still heal Layla and I’ll pray with all of my heart that he does. Enjoy every second with her and never give up hope! Dr. Russell is amazing, but God is even more amazing! Trust in them both.
Praying. Praying. Praying.
Dear God
We pray and ask you to please cure Layla from this sickness and pain that her and her family are enduring. We pray and ask you to please let these treatments that Layla in undergoing to cease the sickness and pain. Please give Layla and her family the strength to fight against this horrible disease that it attacking her. Please let the chemo shrink these tumors so Layla can live a long life to enjoy with her family.
Amen
The tears had threatened to falland my heart has been heavy since I read your Tweets on Friday, and the tears finally broke free when I read your blog. I cried and prayed until I fell asleep. I don’t know how you do it, Shanna. You are living every parent’s worst nightmare with grace and courage. Keep making memories. Enjoy every moment. And I will keep praying for a miracle.
I am so sorry for your pain, i will remember you in my prayers and remember God still does miracles andwe have to hold the faith, turn your flash ligjt off as hard as it is and trust the will of God, Bless you and your family
I don’t know you…just saw a pray posted on facebook, I read this blog entry with tears running down my face. My heart aches for Layla, for you, your husband and your entire family. I pray that God gives you the courage & strenth to make it through this tough & enduring time!!
I was forwarded to your blog by my friend Heather Davis. In Aug my husband was diagnosed for the 2nd time with Stage 3 Cancer. I know how hard it was for it to be my husband , I can not imagine if it was my child. My heart and soul aches for you and your family. I pray that in 2 months we will reading a post that Layla is doing better and the tumors have stopped growing.
My heart is so broken I can barely type, I have never been blessed enough to meet or even see your baby girl in person, but I have been following her story.
My son was diagnosed with Stage 4 NB last year as well, and he has been going through everything about the same time as Layla has. Except for they did his radiation after his stem cell transplant, so he just finished that. And he has not had his last set of scans yet, so as I sit here typing this I am shaking, because the only thought going through my mind is ” my god this could be me in a few weeks ” so please know that I am thinking and praying for you every second of everyday and I believe miracles do happen.
One thing I wanted to tell you, and I’m sure her doctors have mentioned this to you, or at least thought about it, but Gabrial is going to start what they call “immunotherapy” very soon, its supposed to boost their antibody count significantly, and the antibodies hunt down and kill NB cells. It has no side effects usually, and might be something that could work for Layla, please email me at kymberly.latham@yahoo.com if you have time, and let me know if they have told you about this yet.
Again my heart breaks for you, your family, and little layla grace, but I will always hold out hope and faith!
Kymberly
Hello,
I am a TCH NB mom as well. I was told by a friend (NB mom too) about your site…and that you are looking for a supplement. My son is doing vitamin c infusions. If you have an interest you can email me. I left my address in the infomation section when leaving this message.
I will be keeping Layla in my prayers.
Claire
Hello,
I am a TCH NB mom as well. I was told by a friend (NB mom too) about your site…and that you are looking for a supplement. My son is doing vitamin c infusions. If you have an interest you can email me. I left my address in the infomation section when leaving this message.
I will be keeping Layla in my prayers.
Claire
I’m in England and have been following Layla Grace’s story for the last few days. I truly don’t know what to say apart from telling you that my thoughts and love are with all of you at this unimaginably difficult time. I am praying for you. Layla Grace’s courage has astounded me in such a short space of time.
Hi,
You don’t know me, I was sent a link from a friend on Facebook. I sat at my computer reading about Layla and crying. What a beautiful girl she it! My heart breaks for you and your family. Please know that Layla is in my daily thoughts and prayers.
God Bless You All
My heart aches for the fire you are walking through. Our family is stepping up our prayers for your sweet Layla Grace and believing God for a miracle. We pray that you will find comfort, peace, and strength.
Hi,
I don’t personally know you, but I know Sherry. Your story has touched me. I have no words, but I have been shedding many tears today as I have read about your family and Layla Grace. I have a baby boy who is 13 1/2 months and it kills me that your family is going through this. Just makes me remember to enjoy every moment with my little guy as you never know what tomorrow may bring.
You can see the joy and light in Layla Grace just through her pictures.
I will continue my tears, thoughts, and prayers for your family.
Love,
Heather, Jason, and baby Karch
Hello, You are not alone. As I am writing this I am lifting Layla, you and your family in prayer. I am asking for Layla’s healing and you and your family’s strength to see her through this process. I am Harley’s Nana. I don’t know if you met Harley at Texas Children’s but he was there off and on from July 2008 through July 2009. Harley’s Helpers Ministry is operated out of the First United Methodist Church of Katy. I don’t know where you are located but please contact me so that we can speak. I know this is a very difficult time for Layla, you and yours; I want to try and make this a little better for you. I really believe God puts children like Harley and Layla on this earth so that we can learn love, laughter, faith and grace. Much Love Nana Ruppert
Lifting Layla, you and yours up in prayer during this process. I am asking for healing and strength. I am Harley’s Nana. Harley’s and Laylas are put on this earth to teach us love, laughter and faith in God. Please ccntact me at Harley’s Helpers Ministry, First United Methodist Church of Katy.
Dearest Layla Grace and Family,
I have been given your site by my dear friend Allison Silviera, who also has a sweet baby boy, Gavin, fighting this battle. I have read your post and want you to know that my heart, thoughts, and prayers are with you all. The puppy is adorable and I believe will bring your little angel many laughs in the days to come. I am praying for complete healing for your sweet baby girl. May God continue to wrap you in a blanket of serenity even when the storms of life may feel like they are closing in. These are they days that we will be mightly prayer warriors for God’s greatest gifts; His children:) May you always know that we are all around you praying for little Layla Grace.
Sincerely,
A Friend in Christ
Genesis D. Sleight-Price
Shanna,
I am from the UK and have been following your twitter page for quite a while now.
There is nothing anyone can say, except that my thoughts are with you and your entire family at what i can only imagine to be a truly horrific time.
I’m not deeply religious, but i know that God will do whatever he can for your family, i believe miracles can happen….and if ever i knew (i dont know you but feel i do through your tweets) a little girl and a family who deserved a miracle it would be you.
I do feel i have to say that you are a true inspiration, so many people would have crumbled, but you just seem to get stronger. You are obviously a very loving mother with beautiful children, including layla grace. So, i have no right to say it but well done to you and your family! you are going through so much pain yet you bring hope, faith and strength to so many!
And, layla grace, well all i can say to you little one is, stay strong for your mummy and daddy and know that you have the love of so many people worldwide!
all my love
i pray for a miracle
rachel xxx
Dear Shanna Layla Grace & Family,
Layla Grace’s story has touched me so deeply. As a mother of 3 children 12,11 & 28 mo. my heart goes out to you all. I’m praying for a miracle of complete healing in little Layla Grace’s body to be Cancer free. I pray she will fully recover from her Cancer and her body will heal completely, that she will grow up and have a long, happy and healthy life ahead of her & that her story of complete healing will be a testimony for years to come. I believe all things are possible through God and prayer in numbers works miracles. Layla, you sweet angel have stolen my heart. God Bless you sweetie and I pray your Gaurdian Angel will keep you safe. You are a precious little girl and I will pray for you always and continue to follow your story. Layla, you are absolutely one of Gods most precious gifts. Shanna, you are amazingly strong and I will pray for your faith to stay strong as well. I love you both and I will rejoice that you will be healed and free of Cancer. I am posting your story on my Facebook page so that many others will hear Layla’s story and more prayers will be coming her way.
We are praying for a miracle,
I Love You,
Kristie
I’ve been down that road. My prayers are with you and Layla. I trust the Lord will deliver her. I Lost my first born Samuel, 5 years ago and a daughter just last july. Her brother named her Ruby. I have tributes to them on face book.
http://www.facebook.com/video/video.php?v=1025113717301
http://www.facebook.com/video/video.php?v=1143416794804
Layla and you are not alone…….
Layla Grace and Family,
I can not imagine the agony you and your loved ones are going through. All I can say is that you are all in my prayers. I pray That God will remove this disease from your beautiful, precious angel and that you will be blessed in watching her grow and live a wonderfully happy life. I pray that you all have strength in the coming days. Faith is a powerful thing…don’t ever let it go. I am praying for a miracle…”In the Lord, put your trust.” Psalms 11:1
With love,
Connie
I was referred to this site by a friend – and although we don’t know you, I am praying for miracles for your daughter and your family. I hope it brings you some solace to know that there are so many of us out here, hoping for miracles and thinking of you non-stop.
Warmest regards,
Terez in Sugar Land
Here I felt so sorry for myself for these 2 recent miscarriages and how unfair God is to ME….then I read this. I cannot EVEN imagine how this must feel to you. I am so very sorry, and there is nothing else I can even say, except this just ISN’T FAIR??!!!! My thoughts and prayers are with you and your beautiful angel girl. You sound to me like the most wonderful woman–who is VERY strong, even tho you may not feel that right now–you ARE–and so is your little girl!
I have heard your story through a friend on facebook and have read your blog about Layla. I am in tears right now and just wanted you to know I am praying for Layla and your family! I had Hodgkins when I was 20 and now as a mother of two little ones, I am grieving over hearing what life has thrown your way. I love that you’re holding onto Jesus and not blaming him as He did not give Layla cancer. We live in a fallen world w/ cancer and disease. The hope we have is Heaven and being reunited with children and fellow believers. I will be praying for God to work miracles, and for His presence to be evident.
As a mother myself, I can only imagine what you and your family are going through. I have never met you or your family, but your story has touched me. Please know that you all are in my prayers.
You are the most amazing mother and person I’ve ever seen. I can’t believe you are able to verbalize all this. I lost a precious doggie to cancer five months ago and am still not over her. I can’t imagine watching your child go through this. It is just hell. You make it look easy and I know it’s not. God bless and keep you all in the palm of his hand.
My prayers are with you.
I HAVE NEVER MET LAYLA, BUT HAVE BEEN FOLLOWING HER STORY ON TWITTER. YOU HAVE SHOWN US WHAT A MOTHER SHOULD BE. I AM A MOTHER OF 6 KIDS AND COULD NEVER IMAGINE WHAT IT WOULD BE LIKE TO BE IN YOUR SHOES. WE WILL PRAY FOR YOUR FAMILY! GOD IS GOOD AND WILL HEAR OUR PRAYERS. STAY STRONG! LAYLA IS VERY LUCKY TO HAVE YOU!
MEL
I don’t even know you, your site was forwarded to me by a friend, but I’ve read every post. And I’ve cried with every one. My heart is breaking into a thousand pieces for your family. I will never, ever understand WHY!!!! On this earth, I will never, ever understand. It makes NO sense to me. I can just hardly breathe the lump is so big in my throat. I’m telling you this because I do appreciate you sharing your story, and sweet little Layla with us. And I hope you know, that perfect strangers are aching with you. You are not alone.
I have a good friend who wrote the most beautiful song. If you want to email me, I could mail you a copy of the CD. It’s called, “Never out of My Hand.” The words are:
I know your heart is weary
I know your hope is gone
I know the night is all around you
I know you don’t feel strong
I know your burden’s heavy
I know the tears you’ve cried
I even know your broken heart
And the pain you try to hide
But don’t you know that I’m your Father
Remember you’re my child
Let my love, remind you of
this promise one more time
(chorus)
You’re never out of My hand
You’re never alone
When the winds of life surround you
Let me gently lead you home
For I created you, I love you
I’ve called you My own
You’re never out of my hand
And my child, even now, you are never alone
I know the wounds you’ve suffered
I know each cry for help
I know the desperation
And I see your lonliness
But I am God almighty
I am the King of Kings
I am your Gentle Shepherd
And the restorer of all things
And I know you think this problem’s big
But My power is bigger still
Release your will, and just be still
Find rest in Me alone
(Chorus)
She actually wrote it for a pastor at our church who was in his final battle with cancer.
There are no words I could say that will lessen one ounce of your pain. I am praying that God will put the pieces back together of your broken hearts, in time. I know it’ll take a very long time, and that the scars from the break will be there forever.
I am comforted knowing that this immense kind of pain, the suffering on this earth is temporary for all of us.
“These things have I spoken unto you, that in Me you may have peace. In the world you will have tribulation: but be of good cheer; I have overcome the world. ” -John 16:33
I have a little girl about the age of Layla. I pray for her every day and I pray that she is healed. I also pray for peace for her. God bless you and your family. I will continue to pray every single day.
I wanted to let you know my heart goes out to you and your family. I know what its like to have to say goodbye to your child.It is something I pray no one has to go through but the facts are it happens everyday. It is the hardest thing you will ever face in life. It has been 10 years ago for me but the pain of missing him is still very real.He was my only child and I was unable to have more.He was in a car accident and was thrown from the truck.He lived for about 5 hours but never woke up so there was so many things I never got to say.I know that God has a purpose for everything and that it was not for me to understand but just to except with all of my faith. The best advise I can give to you and your family is to trust That God is going to carry you when you cant walk yourself and love you through your difficult time and pain. I have adopted three wonderful children since my sons death and we honor his time here on earth. His birthday would have been Feb.23rd and days like those are hard but sweet as well because he celebrates with Jesus now. I pray for you to have peace. God Bless you.
I’ll never forget those baby blues….so I’m certain her Mother never will! You’d never make it through….the Lord will carry you through!
this post is one month old today, showing what an amazing fighter little Layla truly is. So is the entire family. Love and prayers to you all.
I do not know you or your family, but I got to your site from someone on Facebook. I have cried so hard reading about everything that your beautiful daughter and your family are going through. You are all in my prayers. God works miracles and I hope and pray that he will work one with your daughter. It breaks my heart to know that someone so innocent as a child would ever have to go through this. I have a 15 month old daughter and an almost 4 year old daughter, and I cnanot imagine what you are all going through. May God grant your family health, blessings, and the strength to get through all of this. I will continue to follow you on twitter, in hopes that a miracle occurs, and until then I will be praying for you and your strong little girl.
Dear Ryan and Shanna,
There are few words that can actual bring you comfort or solace during any of this. It’s so hard and I know because I have been there. My first daughter was born anencephalic and died very shortly after she was born. I named her Faith because that is all I had left. But Faith taught me lessons that I was going to need when her brother Nathan was born a year later. He was born with a large tumor coming out of his spinal cord and from his very first day he had to fight. He spent most of his first three years of life in the hospital and has had 47 operations to date. His is a story of fighting and winning where his sister did not. He turned 18 this year and his planning to go off to college. Sometimes I think I am the only person who remembers just how hard it was to get him here. The agonizing decisions when he was in life threatening illness and pain. The burdens of watching him suffer hoping that what I was doing was the right thing, but not ever knowing for sure. He carries physical scars, mine are deep within me because I hurt just as surely as he did.
I see your faith in God and I know that it is hard to accept that he has different plans for Layla then you do. Right now in this moment she is making miracles happen that you think she should not have to, she’s only two…why should she teach grown ups about love? Each life is a gift no matter how short and each life has something to teach the rest of the world if they will only listen. Right now, people are listening to Layla and to you….they hear her breaths and feel love for a child they never laid eyes on. Sometimes it is the smallest of children who have the biggest impacts on the world around them. My pediactrician’s son Noah was born with paralyzed vocal chords. He suffered severe brain damage and never grew mentally past the age of 2 months. He was on a ventalator untill he died at age four. I will always remember what his father said at his funeral. He said “how many of you can say that you never said an unkind to another person? How many of you can say that you were never jealous, angry or any of the things that makes us fall short of the glory of God?” He went on to say that he knew for certain that his son never failed to love, was angry, or hurt another person. Noah, touched many people in his short life by just being the perfect example that God wanted him to be.
When Faith died I recieved many cards and poems and the one I want to give to you will be hard to read. But somewhere in there I think you will find the message that God loves you and Layla no less than those who grow strong and tall.
“I’ll lend you for a little time, a child of mine”, he said,
“for you to love the whle she lives and mourn for when she’s dead.
It may be six or seven years, or twenty-two or three,
But will you, till I call her back, take care of her for me?
She’ll bring her charms to gladden you, and shall her stay be brief,
You’ll have her loving memories as solace for your grief.
I cannot promise she will stay, since all from earth returns.
But there are lessons taught down there I want this child to learn.
I’ve looked the wide world over in my search for teachers true,
And from the throngs that crowd life’s lane, I have selected you.
Now will you give her all your love, nor think te labor vain,
Nor hate me when I come to call to take him back again?”
I fancied that I heard them say,
“Dear Lord, THY WILL be done.
For all the joy the child shall bring,The risk of grief we’ll run.
We’ll shelter her with tenderness, We’ll love her while we may,
And for the happiness we have known, forever grateful stay.
But shall the angels call for her much sooner than we planned,
We’ll brave the btter greif that comes, and try to understand.”
Author Edgar Guest
I picture warm light around Layla, bathed in love from her head to her perfect little toes.
My heart aches again for Faith, Noah, Layla and you. My solace has always been that Faith has perfect knowledge and love in abundance.
Where do I begin. My heart aches for you and your family. I’m reading this and just sobbing. Layla is beautiful. So is the family that surrounds her daily. I will be praying for Layla and your family. God Bless!
New Orleans is praying for you.
My heart goes out to you and your family.
I check everytime I get on the computer to see how your sweet angel is doing.
There are no words to express how I feel for you and what all you are going through But most of all what all Layla is and has gone through.
I pray for peacefulness and strength for all of you.
May God watch over you all.
Your family photos were spectacular. How great you have them.
God Bless
Tammy
I pray for Layla and your family everyday. I think about Layla all day long. I look at my 7 month old daughter and I can’t imagine what you are going through. I pray daily that God will still heal her fully. My heart is heavy and broken that any child has to suffer from cancer. We love you Layla.
I just want to say…I admire your strengths, your weakness & your honesty. Pray for a calm peace to be with you tonight. May Layla rest easy & may you and your husband find the calm within the storm.
I first arrived at your site after following a link on Behind the Ranks Designs Myspace status. The status asked that everyone pray for your daughter. I commend you and your family for your amazing courage and strength. I have never been one to pray much in my adult life, when things have been tough I have said a few words to god but never felt very sincere about it. After visiting your site and reading about your family, last night as I lie in bed I felt compelled to pray. I prayed that you get your miracle and I prayed that god take away the pain. Not just for your daughter but for your family as well. That he be with you in Layla’s final days and wrap his arms around you and your family. I cried the entire time I prayed because I spoke to god from the heart and was sincere in doing so. I am a mother of two, an 11 year old and an infant who is almost 4 months old. The past few days have been different for me, I enjoy every minute I have with them. I am not so quick to become frustrated when my 11 year old is trying to annoy me or when my infant is fussy for no reason. Reading about your family impressed upon me that every day is a gift and nothing should be taken for granted. I know I am just a stranger living states away who you dont know from Eve but I wanted you to know that your family has touched my life and my heart and I will continue to pray for you all! You have beautiful children and they, like u know a love most people will never know. I will continue to pray for your family, may you find peace through your pain.
My heart is broken for you and your beautiful Layla Grace. I have been praying for a miracle since I heard about her. I hope you and your family find strength and courage to get through this pain. We love you beautiful little girl xx
I have fallen to my knees in prayer twice in my life. Once to ask God to heal my broken soul and the other for your daughter. There are no words I can offer but I am sorry and I am changed by knowing of you and your amazing hero!
I couldn’t of said it any better myself. Layla & family are in my thoughts & I have been praying for her to be healed. I want that so, so bad for you guys. I have only been following her story for a little over a week but I feel as though I know her. She is one special little girl. Xoxo
Shanna,
Layla doesn’t need a miracle~She is a miracle!
God put her in your care because you have the grace, and love to share her with all of us!
She has touched so many of us and I don’t believe this would have been possible if she had not been put in the care of such loving and compassionate people as you and Ryan!
Even in your darkest hours you took the time to remind us that there were others that needed our prayers.
Whenever you wrote about your pain at seeing your lovely child go through this, you always tried to add a lighter side, or look for a reason to be grateful!
When Ryan wrote about his experience in Iraq and how blessed we all are to have the basic things that we take for granted every day he must have touched everyone that read that entry!
I was simply amazed that he would take the time to share that lesson, and to remind us to count our blessings at a time when he was going through the most painful experience a parent can ever go through.
*I am so sorry that you, your family, and especially little Layla have gone through so much pain.
I hope and pray that you get through the rest of this journey with your love and faith intact, and that you realize how truly blessed you are to have been the caretakers of one of Gods little angel!
I cry for you and hurt for you, but I am also forever grateful to have been a part of your journey and I thank you deeply for sharing Layla!
You are such an inspiration and comfort in a world gone so crazy and I know that sounds ridicoulous given what you’ve endured this past year but I feel such gratidude and so blessed that I had to thank you!
Much love to you and your whole family and peace and comfort to Layla!
You are truly amazing people!
I am so very sorry to hear about your story. I lost my precious son Tyler Joseph Bartlett to Ewing Sarcoma ( a form of childhood cancer that is a bone cancer). Our family is from southwest Louisiana, once Tyler was diagnosed with cancer we were sent to Memphis, Tenn. to St. Jude Children’s Research Hospital. While there we made friends with many children facing the same cancer as your lovely daughter. I really really HATE childhood cancer sooooo much.
I truly understand everything that you are feeling right now. When my son was first diagnosed I was in such a state of shock. I had seen the St. Jude commercials on tv but never really put that much thought into the fact that children actually die from cancer. Since that time life has taught me a hard lesson.
I sat by my child as he released his final breath on this earth and my heart was shattered into a billion pieces! I love and trust the Lord with all my heart but from that moment on May 31st, 2008 until today I have been in a constant struggle with God on all the how and whys of this experience. I am so glad we have a loving and forgiving God cause this struggle has not always been pretty.
I will be praying for you as you find your way through the up and coming days and weeks and beyond. I will pray with you as you stumble along the shadow of the valley of death and I will pray with you as you search to find your way out!
Peace and Love in Christ
I have been following your blog and twitter posts and praying for you all everyday. I am so in awe of your continued strength as you go through the most difficult time of your lives. You are an inspiration to all parents. Layla is such a beauiful little girl. I wish you all lots of love and hope.
XOXO
I came across info about sweet Layla on Facebook a few weeks ago and have been getting caught up on her story. I follow Twitter every day to see how she is. She is such a brave beautiful little girl. I can’t even imagine what you are going through. I say a prayer every night for Layla and her family.
I wish you strength and courage………….
God bless Baby Layla!
xoxoxoxo
I pray for Layla every day. Each morning I come downstairs and check your website to see how she is doing. Miracles do happen and if anyone deserves one it has to be Layla! May God bless you and your family.
Leah
I wish I knew what to say, I wish I could fix it… my prayers are with you, your family and Layla especially. I bought my soon to be 2yr old daughter Kayla a “Layla tutu” and she will be wearing it in 2yr pics. May God give you strength! with love from Jessica and Kayla
First, I can’t imagine your heartbreak and selfeshly I never want to. I don’t know sweet Layla but I love her very much. 2nd, the courage of you both is breathtaking, inspiring and so very painful. I pray for Layla every night. 3rd, this song helped me through a rough time watching my grandma fade and I listen to it now and all I can think of is Layla. You can probably find it on you tube. I wish everything for all of you.
Poe “Fly Away”
It makes sense that it should happen this way
That the sky should break, and the earth should shake
As if to say: Sure it all matters but in such an
Unimportant way
As if to say:
Fly away, sweet bird of prey
Fly fly away
Nothing can stand in your way
Sweet bird, if you knew the words
I know you’d say: fly, fly away
It makes sense that it should hurt in this way
That my heart should break, and my hands should shake
As if to say: Sure it don’t matter except in the most
Important way
As if to say:
Fly away, sweet bird of prey
Fly fly away
I won’t stand in your way
Sweet bird, if you knew the words
I know that you’d say: fly, fly away
It makes sense that it should feel just this way
That you slowly fade and yet still remain
As if to say: Everything matter in such an invisible way
As if to say: It’s O.K.
Fly…away
I don’t even know where to begin.
All I want you to know is that I am praying for you. I am praying for Layla. I am praying for other children and other families fighting similar battles as you.
I can’t imagine and I hope I never have to imagine what you are going through at this very moment.
I am grateful to have stumbled across your blog and be introduced to your precious daughter and her remarkable life.
I am forever changed because of Layla Grace. So yes, I guess, she has done her job on this Earth as God had wanted her to do. But I still say, damn you God for even considering taking this beautiful, sweet, and tiny baby girl too soon from the ones who need her here.
And now I don’t know how to end. I am praying.
Please Lord give Layla strength let no more harm from this cancer come her way. please Lord put the cancer to cease, let it not take over her body Lord.
Renew her body Lord, let her be a testimony of your healing here on earth.
Give her the strength to survive. heal her lil’ body in the precious name of Jesus. Give her strength from you to sit up to be held by her parents to drink to eat to be healed in the mighty name of Jesus. Cancer you have no place in her body you don’t belong there. I pray Layla’s body will line up w/the word of GOD on what his healing proclaims here on earth.Thank you for hearing our prayers Lord,thank you. I am going to walk by faith and not by sight
Thank you Jesus
candace
All those who trust in the Lord are never put to shame.
Whether or not she makes it like you rightly said, God has let her tiny body spread the word and draw tonnes of people closer to Him.
~He knows the best~
I will be praying for her.
Hello. I was first introduced to your website (and to Layla) on March 8th of this year. Just a few days ago. My heart sank to my feet when I read how ill Layla was, and I prayed so hard that God would heal her. Then just a day later I learned that she had passed away. I am so, so sorry
It sure isn’t fair. Not one bit. Oh, how you must miss that sweet little face, those beautiful eyes, her little voice. My heart goes out to you, and I will continue to pray for your family. Layla is in Heaven now and is at peace, but it is you, her parents, who are going to need so many prayers now. I am sad that she is no longer with you but yet relieved that her suffering and pain has ended. I will be thinking of you all tomorrow, during her memorial service. I live in CA but if I were anywhere near you guys, I would be there to help you celebrate her. What a beautiful light she is! What a radian little soul. She will never be forgotton. Well, I just wanted to let you know that I — along with so many others whom you’ve never met — am thinking of you, am praying for you. God bless you and your littel angel in Heaven!
My mother & I were touched by the website & photos of little Layla Grace. Our hearts go out to you, your husband, & your daughters. I absoluty adore the hats with the flowers & look forward to supporting Layla by purchasing one for my daughter Lalia Rose. She is in safe hands now, being able to rest at peace. God Bless Layla Grace.